i get a terrible headache about once a month. i can feel them coming on: my shoulder starts to tense up, and then my neck, and then on the third day i'm hit with a full-blown pain parade. Weird vision, stabbing in my temple, general discomfort around the back of my head. today the pain was making me nauseous, nauseous, nauseous, and then suddenly, hungry. like, ravenous. like, i had to eat immediately or suffer certain death.

i dashed to the kitchen to warm up my lunch. as luck would have it this was my day to be visited by the fridge stealer (why me?), because all of my food was gone. the bread that i use to make toast: gone (!). the frozen pizzas i keep for emergencies: gone (!!). oh, mysterious fridge stealer, you make life interesting. i never know when i might be forced to forage for food outside the safe walls of my office.

a sandwich sounds good, i thought. i had the brilliant idea to have one made at the local grocery store deli rather than hitting up subway or jimmy johns. seems like a cheaper and fresher way to acquire a sandwich, right?

except. my sandwich was literally one thin slice of meat and one piece of cheese on white bread. not a sub. on white wonder bread. i had to beg for a piece of lettuce. and it cost. four. dollars. and. seven. teen. cents. no chips, no drink, just sandwich.

the guy who rang me up told me to "have a five-star day." i don't want a five-star day. i want a five-star sandwich.

tomorrow, i'll remember to pack.

(the sandwich in question.)