know your onion!

sometimes i feel like an onion. i don't know how to describe this feeling except, well, there's the center of the onion that formed when i was a very little girl, and then every year there's a new layer, until i'm 23 and i'm quite the well-developed onion. but that part at the center, and all of those layers thereafter, are still very much me. sometimes i am the center of my onion, a little girl , and sometimes i am the newest layer, a 23-year old, but more often i am somewhere in between, leaving me to feel very, very 15.

it's hard, sometimes, to look and act 23 but feel six or 15. there are a lot of discrepancies, as i'm sure you can imagine, between appropriate feelings for a 15-year old and someone who is completely finished with college and has been "on her own" for the past year-and-a-half.

things this weekend that made me feel six:
- my dog ate an article of my clothing (tantrum)
- i ate chicken-fil-a (truly enjoying fast food)

things this weekend that made me feel 15:
- a series of events ended up with me home alone on saturday night (self-indulgent loneliness)
- crying in mccoys in front of the waitress (unexplained crying)
- afraid of the waiter at lulus (intimidated by people who seem cooler than me)

things this weekend that made me feel 23:
-cleaned my house for five hours on saturday (deriving joy from chores)
-spent loads of money on nothing very exciting (sensible spending)



do you ever feel like an onion?